Mission Sit or Squat (for the ladies)

In honor of what is apparently Bodily Functions Week here on Mission Mission, my microscopic bladder, and as a visiting blog tourist, I’d like to take this opportunity to praise your bar/restaurant restroom options.

Here’s my unofficial Mission Sit or Squat break down.

(Note: these reviews are strictly for the ladies, although on a previous visit I did  sneak into the men’s room at Beretta and found it to be quite clean.)

Shotwells- definitely a sit. Nice and clean, with no shortage of soap or paper towels.

Amnesia– ugh, squat! On two separate nights I visited, and between them I got in all my isometric exercise for the week. But, I don’t blame the bar, I blame the near-sighted lady patrons.

Tacqueria Cancun– I think I’m going to go with sit, although my judgment may be blurred by the muchas cervezas I consumed earlier in the evening.

The Uptown– hmm, this was kind of a sit/squat situation. On the one hand you have to pass through a completely pitch black room containing the sink, which was almost creepy enough to make me abort mission entirely, but once I braved it I found the toilet itself to be super clean.

But the winner of the week was Benders, if only because the first stall contains this mystical unicorn graffiti!

Unicorns are magical creatures, even when watching you do your business.

Overall, you Mission ladies seem to be way less nasty than us dirty birds back in Boston, or at the very least you have some pretty diligent toilet scrubbers working the bars.

Either way, give yourselves a hand! (but make sure you’ve washed them first, okay?)

Author: Cosmic Amanda

Putting the RAD in Bradford.

5 thoughts on “Mission Sit or Squat (for the ladies)”

  1. hmm, with uptown I have to disagree. (I think its the uptown, I can’t remember, I drink alot) But story goes the line was so long that one upscale patron simply squatted over the drain in the middle of the bathroom because she didn’t want to wait. Also have heard of girls peeing in the sink there. Sooo, no. don’t touch anything in that bathroom.

    1. Hmm, you make an excellent point. I was there on a weeknight and was probably one of only three ladies in the joint. But on the bright side, I hear fernet also doubles as a sanitizer.

  2. um, err, the Uptown used to have blue lights in the toilet so you couldn’t find a vein and shoot up. I haven’t been there since circa ’96 has it changed? Are there still sidewalk hostesses out front?

    If it has changed then I might have to re-think my views on gentrification. I don’t believe it is happening, but maybe the Uptown is the evidence that it is, I mean clean restrooms? At crack whore central?

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