Hot local comedian Moshe Kasher hips us to the hot new local hookup:
Hey fellas! Her Majesty’s Secret Beekeeper is apparently hosting a singles night!
Seriously though, I stopped in to the storefront near 20th and Mission for the first time this weekend. The honey is pricey at $16, but it doesn’t get much more hyper-local than picking between “Inner Mission Honey” vs. “Mission Dolores Honey”. They all taste very different, which I guess isn’t that surprising given the distinct fauna and odors of each neighborhood.
I think I’ll pass on the “MUNI Tracks Above Dolores Park Honey” variety.
Sorry about this, but some of the phrases uttered in this video — shot outside a bar ’round closing time on Saturday night — are just too cute not to share.
UPDATE: By popular demand, a transcript:
Girl: You’re a fuckin’ asshole
Girl: And a hipster would never fuckin’ talk that way
Boy: Hipsters do talk that way
Girl: They don’t
Boy: Hipsters are — have you read anything about us?
Girl: They don’t
Boy: We are fucking assholes
Girl: Oh, ’cause you’re so fuckin’ cool, right?
Girl: You’re an asss
Boy: You are an ass
Girl: I’m not!
Girl: –as a cool kid
Boy: Cool kids are bad too
Girl: You’re a fuckin’ ass
Boy: Don’t limit your boyfriend
Girl: I hope you put your head on the bed and–
Boy: Say something really nasty now
Girl: I’m not going to–
Boy: Try to
Girl: –because I’m a good person
Boy: Try, tryyy!
Girl: I’m not going to
Boy: Try. Feel the darkness coursing through you
Girl: I think you’re a bitch
Girl: You know what? None of this is angering me whatsoever
Boy: You know what? I’m totally zen, so that makes two of us, and we should totally shake on it and fuckin’ do Bikram.
Boy: Yeah, we don’t do that. I was just leading you on
They totally banged I bet.
There’s something to be said for being honest and up front about being a total creep.